MAGAZINE ARCHIVE : JIMMY HILL’S FOOTBALL WEEKLY – 31.10.1969

It’s the tail end of the 1960s, and it’s Jimmy Hill’s Football Weekly, a weekly magazine fronted by the multi talented Jimmy Hill (who died late last year), who was then a pundit for ITV.

You can’t really imagine Andy Townsend’s Football Weekly, can you?

Jimmy Hill uses his column to criticise a BBC reporter who was quick to criticise a recent Chelsea v Arsenal game, likening it to a playground game.

Johnny Morrissey of Everton writes a column and John Robson of Derby County gets a profile.

Ralph Brand, who has played top flight football in England and Scotland, is currently attending a Coaching School with the SFA, and writes a column claiming that Scotland is years behind in terms of coaching tactics.

Bobby Moncur of Newcastle United gets drawn by Ron Davies of Southampton.

There is a full page feature on Fulham, while future Fulham player George Best has a column, where he expresses his frustration at not being able to play for Northern Ireland in their World Cup Qualifier away to Soviet Union as he was playing in a League Cup tie for Manchester United.

Getting in early for the Christmas Market, there is an advert for Jimmy Hill’s Soccer 70, billed as “The best annual on the market”

Alan Birchenall of Chelsea has a column, where he states that footballers in the South of England are just as hard as their counterparts in the North.

There is a book review, of George Best’s Soccer Annual (strange to review a competitor to Jimmy’s own in the annual market) which gets a favourable review, despite the lack of colour photographs.

Ben Arentoft, a Dane playing at Newcastle United gets a profile, where he reveals his favourite meal is Roast Pork.

On the back cover, there was a poster of Brian Kidd of Mancheaster United.

THE GOLDEN AGE OF ADVERTISING

You probably already know as i’ve done a very poor job of denying it, that I am a geek.

One of my geeky activities is that I love watching old videos on Youtube. Total random bollocks, but an insight into a bygone age of television.

So, I just thought i’d share with you, some of my favourite adverts from days of yore currently on Youtube.

We begin, with a Public Service Announcement based on one of my favourite TV shows of all-time as Batgirl complains to Batman about her rights in the workplace while rescuing the Dynamic Duo from a ticking bomb.

Typical woman, eh?

Always picking to most inappropriate moment to jabber on.

You can see the moment when Batman is inwardly saying to himself for her to shut the fuck up and and just deactivate the bomb.

Anyway, she’s a vigilante crimefighter, she doesn’t do it for money, so she should stop complaining. Gotta love Robin’s “Holies”, with “Breaking and entering”, “Act of congress” and “discountent” to add to his various observations during the TV show.

You may have noticed a lack of Adam West in the video, as he was too busy serving the people of Quohog.

Meanwhile, Invest NI forerunner IDB decided it would be a good idea to launch a marketing campaign urging people to work harder, which must be a bit of a bummer when relaxing at home watching TV, only to see an advert telling you to work harder.

Getting in on the public service advertising act, the RUC brought out an advertising campaign asking people to snitch on criminals.

I remember when this ad came out, and it scared the shite clean out of me.

Everytime, I hear ‘Cats In The Cradle’, either by Harry Chapin, Ugly Kid Joe or Jason Downs, all I can think of is this ad, which I suppose shows how successful it was.

Meanwhile, footballers have always been a favourite for ad men to front campaigns as Jimmy Hill demonstrates when educating the nation on road safety.

So cyclists and motorbikers had better be careful on the road, or else their untimely demise will be analysed by Jimmy Hill, as if he’s discussing wether Aston Villa’s second goal was offside on Match of the Day.

Other examples of footballers chasing the ad men’s cash include Brian Clough advertising Shredded Wheat and Saint and Greavsie advertising KFC. That’s Kentucky Fried Chicken, not Kilmarnock Football Club.

Footballers are such money grabbing whores, that they are prepared to appear in adverts before they become a footballer.

One day Jimmy, all those keepy-ups will help you become captain of West Ham United.

As a side note, isn’t “There’s nothing quite like a McDonalds” better than “Ba da ba ba ba, i’m loving it”?

Talking of celebrities appearing in adverts before they were famous, bet Billie Piper wishes she could get the lend of a Sonic Screwdriver and remove this from the nation’s consciousness

And yes, I bought that edition and love the ‘Ultimate Spice Girls Kit’

Talking of the Spice Girls, Remember their Channel Five launch?

I could just imagine the scenes in the recording studio as they try to brainstorm inspiration to write a song about a fifth terrestrial television channel.

It’s just a pity that they didn’t wait a year until 5ive were a big act in the charts. They would have been a more appropriate act to launch the channel.

Anyone who has ever seen the Mitchell and Webb parody of Sky’s football coverage will love this simpler ‘less is more’ advert for the 1986 World Cup. Certainly not as epic as their trailer for the 2008 Olympics

In 1989, Gerry Kelly voiced an advert for a UTV version of the apprentice offering young entrepreneurs a chance in starting up in business.

It’s a different world these days. If a young entrepreneur wants help setting up a business, they just shag the wife of their local MP.

Meanwhile, someone at Austin Rover though it would be a good idea to have an advertising campaign fronted by Noel Edmonds and Derek Trotter.

I don’t know why Austin Rover would want their product associated with a shifty looking, dodgy, untrustworthy wideboy …………… such as Noel Edmonds.

So, i’ll finish with this trailer for ‘Life On Mars’, where the past meets the present in a piece of TV genius