THE FRIDAY FIVE – 7.7.2017

1. Dagny – Wearing Nothing
2. The Killers – The Man
3. Liam Gallagher – Chinatown
4. George Ezra – Don’t Matter Now
5. Stereo Honey – The Heart

Yesterday, was National Kissing Day. I didn’t get one. Awww.

If you didn’t get one either, here’s a kissing based chart for you. Ironically, there are no Kiss songs.

FIVE SONGS ABOUT KISSING

1. Stephen Duffy – Kiss Me
2. Seal – Kiss From A Rose
3. Faith Hill – This Kiss
4. Sixpence None the Richer – Kiss Me
5. Katy Perry – I Kissed A Girl

THE FRIDAY FIVE – 4.3.2016

1. Lukas Graham – 7 Years
2. James – Nothing But Love
3. Coldplay – Hymn For The Weekend
4. Richard Ashcroft – This Is How It Feels
5. Nathaniel Rateliffe and the Bad Sweats – I Need Never Get Old

Firstly this week, an apology. Who to? The nation of Wales, all 3 million of them. Last Tuesday was St David’s Day and I forgot to do a Welsh Music Chart.

A bit belatedly, here is a Welsh Music Chart for St David’s Day.

FIVE SONGS BY WELSH ACTS

1. Stereophonics – Dakota
2. Donna Lewis – I Love You Always Forever
3. Bonnie Tyler – Total Eclipse Of The Heart
4. Manic Street Preachers – Autumn Song
5. Lisa Scott-Lee – Electric

I could just about get away with offending the Welsh, but there’s one group of people you shouldn’t offend, and that’s Internet Feminists, which is why there was never any danger of me forgetting International Women’s Day next Tuesday.

So, to celebrate this event, here’s some related charts for you – Female acts and songs with female names and pronouns.

FIVE SONGS BY FEMALE SINGERS

1. Nina Nesbitt – He’s the One I’m Bringing Back
2. Jane Weidling – Rush Hour
3. Lisa Loeb – Stay
4. Sinead Lohan – Whatever It Takes
5. Brianna Corrigan – Love Me Now

FIVE SONGS BY GIRL GROUPS

1. Sugababes – Soul Sound
2. Little Mix – Black Magic
3. Girls Aloud – Biology
4. Madasun – Don’t You Worry
5. All Saints – Pure shores

FIVE SONGS BY FEMALE FRONTED BANDS

1. Chvrches – Leave A Trace
2. Blondie – Heart Of Glass
3. Texas – Black Eyed Boy
4. Hole – Celebrity Skin
5. Sixpence None The Richer – Kiss Me

FIVE SONGS WITH FEMALE NAMES IN THE TITLE

1. The Killers – Jenny Was A Friend Of Mine
2. Oasis – Lyla
3. Jon Bon Jovi – Janey Don’t You Take Your Love To Town
4. Glasvegas – Geraldine
5. Franz Ferdinand – Eleanor Put Your Puts On

FIVE SONGS WITH WOMAN/GIRL/SHE/ HER IN THE TITLE

1. The Kooks – She Moves In Her Own Way
2. White Town – Your Woman
3. Ash – Girl From Mars
4. Neil Finn – She Will Have Her Way
5. Kate Bush – Rubberband Girl

Of course, when International Men’s Day comes around, there’ll be similar charts for the menfolk.

If you don’t know when International Men’s Day is, just go on Twitter on Tuesday and you’ll have smug and self righteous comedians (looking at you Richard Herring) and journalists pointing it out to you in a patronising manner.

It’s on November 19th, if you want to save yourself the effort of being spoken down to by patronising wankers (looking at you Richard Herring) desperate to boost their own personal brand.

That’s eight months away. Until then, you have St Patrick’s Day, St George’s Day, Euro 2016 and International Yorkshire Day charts to listen to.

50 YEARS OF TOP OF THE POPS : JUN 27 – JUL 3

We start this week, with Leigh Nash, 38 this week, of Sixpence None The Richer, inviting us all to kiss her.

Meanwhile, it’s 12 years this week since John Entwhistle died (Apologies for the picture and sound quality on this)

Back to birthdays, Clint Boon was 55 this week.

Nicole Scherzinger, the only Pussycat Doll whose name people know, turned 36 this week.

Remember when Abs from Five had a solo career?

Meanwhile, Cheryl Cole turned 31 this week.

And now, two words to make 50 year old men go weak …….. Debbie Harry.

Peter Kay turned 41 this week. Helping to get this to Number 1 is his only worthwhile musical contribution.

Vince Clarke, the Mozart of Synths turned 54 this week. He’s been on TOTP with a few acts, not even making an effort to hide the fact he’s miming with …..

Depeche Mode

Yazoo

And of course, Erasure.

And sometimes, appearing on stage in mannequin form (he actually is on stage – keep an eye out for him), while Andy Bell is dressed like a Bay City Roller.

To end, i’m going to see Erasure in November. Hopefully Vince will actually be there, and not a mannequin.